My Happy List

James is taking a pretty good nap this afternoon, so I have time to link up my Happy List with Mamarazzi over at Dandelion Wishes!

1. I'm happy that I finally allowed myself to get rid of my featureless flip phone and upgraded to a snazzy Droid 2! Not only am I now officially super cool, but I love playing games, searching for geocaches and reading books on it. Oh yeah, and I call people with it occasionally :)

2. I'm happy that I have an appointment to get my hair cut next Thursday! I have been DYING for a cut recently and I always sabotage myself by waiting, waiting, and waiting until I can't stand it anymore and then end up with a bad impulse cut at a walk in place in a strip mall. No more my friend! A wonderful lady at church is a professional stylist and agreed to cut my hair. Ahh, I can feel the beautiful hair already.

3. I'm happy that even though I'm not losing weight, I feel like things are looking and fitting better. Which means I am gaining muscle right? Or something. Either way, I feel like all of the geocaching exercise and trying to eat better have been slowly but surely making my body something I sort of recognize.

4. I'm happy that my mom is coming to visit for Memorial Day and that Anthony has the day off of work. He actually has a two day weekend!! We are going to have so much fun, and Anthony and I are going to have a little date night out of the house Sunday night after James goes to bed. Nothing too much since it is Sunday, just some time to take a walk by ourselves on the beach, but still exciting!

So what are you happy about this week?

Our little cub scout

Surprise, surprise, Anthony and I both got cub scout callings in our new ward :) Wednesday night there was a court of honor for a youth in our ward to receive his eagle scout! We really wanted to go and support him, so even though it was kind of late for the little guy, we all went. Of course, James had to wear his "I heart cubs" onesie that our last pack made for a going away present. It really made me miss them...

Funny story: when I went to put the onesie on him, I saw how big it was and thought "this is going to be HUGE on him". Imagine my surprise when it fit him pretty well! I guess I need to adjust in my head how big I think he is :)

Free stuff!

Y'all know how I love free stuff right? There is an awesome giveway going on right now on this awesome blog I follow called Dandelion Wishes. (Thanks for the recommendation Leah!) I highly recommend checking this blog out, it is so much fun to read and there is always something to participate in!

It is super easy to enter, and who knows? You might end up with some fabulous free stuff in the mail!

To enter, just click here and follow the entry instructions. Have fun!

Fun in the crib

James loves to watch his mobile go round and round. The only thing that stinks about it is that you have to wind it up every 5 minutes!

                                              

Did this kid grow overnight???

Friday Confessional

I confess...

I can't stand it when my kid has boogers. Whenever I see them, I watch them like a hawk until James starts crying... (and we all know he will eventually). Then, since he is crying anyway, I do my best to get them out with a burb cloth. Which he hates. But I don't care because I can't stand them that much.

I confess...

I used to be exact when someone would ask me how old James is because I was so proud of how old he was. Now I round down to the nearest month (even when he is closer to the next month) because I think it gives me more forgiveness for my post-pregnancy body.

I confess...

I love Bethenny Frankel. Love, love, love. I can't stop watching her reality show, which you can watch for free on Bravo TV.com. I watched the episodes that featured the birth of her daughter and her life with a newborn (and live in help!!!) in the early days right after James was born and it makes me feel like we are bonded in some way, like we are new moms together. Even though she doesn't know me... Similarly, there are a few celebrities couples that I am fairly certain my husband and I would be really good friends with if we happened to meet someday. You just get a sense for some people, you know? :)

I confess...

I love it when any baby besides mine cries in public. It makes me feel like I am not alone in the world. And it makes me way too gleeful inside that it actually isn't my baby making a fuss for once.

I confess...

I get really irritated when I go to a garage sale and discover that all someone is selling are old knick knacks and similarly lame junk. NO one wants it!!!! You are supposed to sell things that actually have value. Not stuff that looks like you got it out of a landfill.

So what are your confessions today?

Things I never thought I would say

A few things that I have found myself saying that I never thought I would say:

• I have a happy, smiley baby! Oh. my. word. I never thought this kid would smile or be happy, since he spent the first 3 months of his life screaming and trying to make me go crazy :) He smiles ALL the time now. He still gets cranky, but I think that it is a normal cranky and seems like no big deal at all compared to what we went through with him in the beginning. When I get him out of his crib in the morning, he usually gives me a big smile (even though he was just crying) and he just grins and grins when Anthony or I play with him. He loves to look at our faces and we are starting to notice that he smiles MUCH more at us than at anyone else. That is cool :)

• I actually like getting up at night with him. Shock! I never, ever, thought I would say this, but now that I can get good 4 hour stretches of sleep at night getting up is not as bad as it used to be. I love how sweet and cuddly he is at night and how he grins at me while he is drifting off back to sleep. He does so well at night and goes right back to sleep after eating but I usually rock him for several minutes after I could have put him down because I just don't want to stop holding him. I love that the entire house is quiet and dark and it is just me and him. I get to watch his sleepy, droopy eyes as he falls asleep in my arms, and I find myself taking mental snapshots in my head all the time.
• I don't mind it when he cries. A few weeks back, I decided that I just wasn't going to let it get to me when he cries, that I would find a way to shut down the anxiety that builds in my stomach. I was feeling trapped inside of my house, afraid to go anywhere or do anything with him because I was afraid that he would cry. Not anymore! I've decided that if I want to go and do something, we will do it and if he cries, he cries. I feel much more sane now that I can get out and do things, and James is doing pretty well with adjusting to being out and about. He still gets fussy at times, but I figure he will never learn how to do it if I don't put him in the situation.

I've been thinking lately about how much my life has changed and how much I have changed as a person now that I am a parent. I am learning to do everything I can to stop and enjoy life in the moment. I guess living with a little guy that literally changes and grows everyday can do that to you! You have to cherish each moment because in an instant he has grown and has moved on to doing something else equally awe inspiring (at least to his parents! probably not to anyone else). My friend Leah is an awesome mom and totally inspired me during one of our conversations. We were talking about things we want to do someday and how hard it can be to be a parent sometimes. She said that she tries to remind herself that this is her season in life, and to remember that there will be more seasons later on that will bring all different opportunities and challenges. I've tried to make that my mantra, that this is my season in life and to live it to its fullest instead of worrying about missing out.

Making noise

I finally caught James on video doing his noises. Sometimes it sounds just like he is trying to imitate talking. We love to hear him do this, it is so funny!

Play Hard, Sleep Hard

Playing can be hard work! Sometimes you just need a little nap:

                                     

Our little boy is getting so big! He has started to really talk to us and make noises. We keep trying to get it on video, so hopefully we will have a video of it soon. He is chunking up like a champ and is growing so much. I need to go through his clothes and move him over to 3-6 month clothes. Outfits that fit him just a few weeks ago are getting way too snug!! He has started to drool a lot and is constantly chewing on his hands, his pacifier, or a blanket so we think that teething has begun. Fun :)

Geocache #2

Early this morning James and I set out on our second geocaching adventure! Anthony was getting ready for work, so he decided to take pictures of our set up :)

Not liking it for some reason, trying to calm him down.

I didn't have to use a GPS for this one, the descriptions were pretty helpful and I was fairly certain I knew exactly where to look once I got there. I read that there were a lot of ducks in the duck pond I was walking to, so I made sure to put some bread in my bag for them.

I found it!

The fake duck had a bottom that slid out to reveal a secret compartment

As I was signing the log, a few ducks rushed over to see what I had for them.

This cache was 1.7 miles away from my house, so 3.4 miles round trip. I thought it would be no problem, I used to routinely walk 3.2 miles on my lunch break but man was I tired towards the end!

Interesting things I noticed/learned on my walk:
* There are at least 4 military veterans on the street I live on. Most of them have a flag pole in their yard with an American flag and then a military flag (POW, marines, etc...). Two of them live right next door and across the street!

* I wandered by a garage sale on my way back and started looking through a stack of books an old woman had for sale. She was at least 65, and here are a few sample titles of the books: "Sex over age 50", "A guide to getting it on", "A passion filled marriage"....so funny! and awkward...

* For some reason, you get a lot of strange looks when you power walk by, wearing a baby. I don't think we are that weird, but with a large majority of our neighbors being retired seniors maybe it is just a new thing to them? Were there no baby wearing moms back in the day?

Anthony's First Geocache

Yesterday for our evening walk, I decided to take Anthony to find his first geocache! This one was listed as being pretty tricky, so I hadn't attempted it by myself. Luckily, Anthony was able to download a geocache app on his phone that listed all of the information from the geocache website and turned your phone into a compass that pointed the way to go. Cool!

Anthony loves how we look whenever James and I get ready for a walk. He thinks it is so funny!

We've learned to tuck a burp cloth in the wrap because this kid loves to spew!

The GPS kept leading us right to this barricade. We knew that the cache was listed as really cleverly hidden and camouflaged, so Anthony suggested looking behind the reflectors. I started to look around and noticed that this reflector looked a little different from the rest....

 It's a magnet!!

 If you look closely you can see that there is a slit on the back with a place for the log for you to sign. I was so proud that I got to sign this one!

I know you can tell that I am loving geocaching since the last few posts were about it, but I can't get over how much fun it is! Especially when you make a find like that one, you feel so accomplished! We see so many interesting things that we never would have seen before when we go on our adventures. Yesterday we got to see the cutest basset hound puppy taking a walk close to where we found the cache. Plus I am getting tons of exercise!

Bath time

There are no pictures that go with this post, for reasons that will become obvious, but I have figured out how to get James to like the bath!

Here is how it happened. I needed to change James' diaper, so I put him on the changing table and took his diaper off. Then I noticed that he had soaked his onesie with drool, so I took that off to change it. Then, looking at my cute naked boy I thought "this would be a good time to weigh him". So I picked him up and took him across the house into the master bathroom where the scale is. I weighed myself (the most painful part) and then I picked him up off the bed and weighed us together. (He weighs 11 pounds by the way!). Then I happened to glance at the bathtub and thought: "Man, that tub is big. I bet I could fit both of us in it!" Ding! Now I really wanted to see what he would do if I got in the tub with him. Would he scream?

I went and got all of his bath stuff, basically just a towel, soap, and the little mesh stand for him to lay on in the tub. I got in and slowly turned the water on. He was mesmerized! He loved it!! He was laughing and kicking his feet and staring at everything. I only filled up the water an inch or so, so I would take the washcloth and drip water over him. He didn't mind at all!! We spent a good 30 minutes in there before I decided it was time to get out. No crying whatsoever! Who knew that all it would take was adding a mommy to the bathtub to make it all better :)

Geocaching

I have really been wanting to get outside and start walking more often, but being who I am I can't just go walk. I need a goal, an activity, something to accomplish otherwise I get bored to tears. So, James and I decided to go geocaching! Anthony had never heard of it before, so if you are like him and don't know what it is, geocaching is an outdoor "treasure-hunting" game where people hide containers at different coordinates and then post the location and clues online. You use a GPS to find the coordinates and then search for the cache. Inside you will usually find a logbook where you write your name and the date when you found it and sometimes there will be a collection of small trinkets to collect. You are free to take one as long as you leave another one in its place. I looked online and there are 9 different ones within 2 miles of our house and today we found our very first one!

Trying to get a picture of the two of us.

Build-a-bear hat still fits!

Today was our first outing with James in a moby-style wrap. So comfortable!

 

We found it!!

Push the turtle aside to reveal the treasures

Look at how many people have found this! It has been going since 2009.

So much fun! I can't wait to find our next one. I think we will try one that is supposed to be by a duck pond next...

3 Months

Yesterday was James' 3 month birthday! Of course, if you read yesterday's post, you know that I didn't really feel like writing about it :)

Here is his car seat picture. I was more zoomed out in his recent picture, so it is hard to tell sizes, but if you look at the insert in his carrier you will see that he fills it out much more. Look at his head! There is no space at the top anymore. This kid keeps getting bigger, but doesn't really look all that chunky to me. I think he is going to be a lanky kid like his dad!

Today he has actually been a lot less fussy and had much more happy time than usual. I'm not sure why, but we did start giving him an extra ounce at each feeding today, so maybe he is getting more full and satisfied? The last time we increased the amount he got in his bottles, he would just spit up more, but today seems like he was ready for more food :) I was even able to get some happy shots of him:

I was able to get so many happy pictures of him by making farting noises! Such a boy :)

In case any of you were wondering (which none of you probably were :) we have moved from nursing to giving him bottles of breast milk that I pump throughout the day. It takes a lot of time and effort, but it is light years better than our struggles with breastfeeding! We have been doing that for over 2 weeks now and are still going strong.

Things he loves at 3 months: ceiling fans, farting noises, someone on the floor playing with him (he doesn't like to play alone), playing on his tummy, music, getting his diaper changed, playing in his bouncy seat, sleeping in his swing, being swaddled, his pacifier, getting fed :)

Things he hates at 3 months: being in his car seat, when no one is paying attention to him, spitting up, having to wait AT ALL for his bottle, feeling tired (he literally will turn the switch from one moment to the next of being happy to being beyond fussy as soon as he gets tired), taking a bath. He is getting slightly better about his bath. If I do it after he has eaten, he will give weak little cries of protest instead of full on screaming. 

A difficult day

Today was such a seriously frustrating day. James was soooooo fussy all day. Here is how it went:
6am, James woke up. I fed him, got him back to sleep, then I pumped and got ready for church. Ended up going through almost my entire wardrobe to try to find something to wear that fit me that didn't make me feel like a huge blah. Seriously, I must be the only woman alive that looks bigger 3 months after having baby than when it was only a few weeks after. 8:30am, fed him again really quick and then we got in the car to go to church. The kid SCREAMED the entire time. I am seriously on edge already.

Then we get into church and of course, the chapel is full, so there is no where to sit. It drives me crazy that they never open the overflow so we can discretely go sit down when we are a few minutes late. Instead we have to parade in and walk all the way to the front with a screaming baby. As soon as we found a seat and sat down, the kid started getting out of control, so I turned around and walked back out with him. He eventually settled down, so I went back about 10 minutes later and he fussed and slept fitfully for the rest of the hour. Someone else had a two month old that just sat in their lap quietly the entire time...I didn't mean to, but I couldn't stop staring at them. So not fair!

Then, the next hour we go for Sunday school. As soon as we get in there, he starts screaming. So I took him out, changed him, and fed him. I came back about 20 minutes later and he was happy for a little while, but started screaming again during the prayer. Nice. I gave him to Anthony for the last hour, thinking that I could take a little break and try to get something out of church.

A few minutes into our lesson, I hear him screaming in the hallway. Anthony hasn't really been able to quiet him down recently, so I leave to go save him. Anthony is walking him in the hallway, looking frazzled. Anthony kind of jokingly told me about a woman we don't know who told him he was holding him wrong and that is why he was screaming and how she offered to take James from him...I just rolled my eyes. I take him and calm him down a little bit and he seems happier, so I go back into relief society. 10 minutes later I hear screaming, so I leave again and Anthony and I decide to just go home since church will be over in a few minutes. I am holding him and bouncing him while Anthony grabs the diaper bag and the same woman comes over to tell me that I am holding him wrong and that if I would just hold him differently he would stop crying. After seeing the look in my eye, she might have rethought what she was saying, because then she said, "I shouldn't tell you, you're the mom". At this point I am frustrated and on the verge of tears, so I am trying to be polite, but probably not succeeding, and blurt out "I know my baby!!" while Anthony is pulling me toward the door. As soon as we get in the car (with James SCREAMING) in his car seat I dissolved into tears and can't stop yelling about how ridiculous it is that nobody likes being told what to do as a parent, including the people who do it, so why do they??? I'm sure the woman was well meaning, but at times like that it just feels like criticism, as in "the reason your baby is crying is because you are doing x,y, and z wrong" I wish I had a baby that didn't cry all of the time, for literally no reason, but that is just not the child I was given. Advice from parents who don't have a child like that is not welcome because it just doesn't apply. Please don't offer unless I ask. What I need is support, not an implication that I am not good enough.

It is so difficult to take this kid places, it seriously isn't worth it most of the time. Anthony and I listened to some conference talks after we got home from church and put James down for a nap and one speaker in particular talked about parenting and being regular with scripture study and family home evening (and going to church in our situation). He said that children won't necessarily remember what was said or what they learned, but they will remember that you had it. I felt a little bit better about our day at church. He may scream and it may be a stressful experience for everyone, but eventually he will grow out of it and he will remember, from as early as he can, that we go to church on Sundays. That the gospel is a priority in our lives. Like my sister always reminds me, this is a marathon not a sprint, so I need to find ways to be happy in the moment and pace myself because we are in this for the long haul :)